video; joint post with Abigail Fowler

[killthepast]

[ The camera switches on, giving viewers a shot that careens wildly from floor to ceiling before focusing on Abigail's face. ]

Get ready to meet your new god, bitches, because winter is coming.

[ She spent time working on that line.

She turns the phone, giving her audience a blurry shot of the room, and then finally of her companion, now seated on what is obviously the throne of Winter. ]

Say something, sad sack. You're on candid camera.

[ And sitting on the frosty throne is none other than Kylo Ren, scowling at Abigail, gritting out: ] Kylo Ren. [ His name's not sad sack!! HE'S AN ANGRY SACK. Anyway... ] And winter isn't coming. It's here.

[ From off camera: ] Sort of, anyway. Can't you make it snow harder? I don't know how the god thing works, but I thought the whole deal was omnipotence. This is more like semi-potence. Let's bury this fucking town. C'mon.

[ The scowl fades as he gives her a curious look, really studying Abigail with interest for... possibly the first time. Lady, what's your deal? ] What kind of a follower are you? [ IT'S SNOWING, OKAY? BE HAPPY WITH THAT. Or find him more followers.... ]

[She covers what she thiiiiinks is the microphone (it isn't) and talks as though explaining something dull to a child:] Look, fam, in my world they call it "friend and savior". I could have just let you keep wandering around until someone kidnapped you and sold you to a circus, but instead I found you this nifty throne complete with superpower. Now, smile and say hi to the kiddies. You need some priests in here.

[ NO ABIGAIL, NO. YOU TRIGGERED HIS RAGE. Standing up abruptly, he snaps back at her, voice feral: ] You don't tell me what to do!

[ Kylo Ren's 29 going on 16. ]

[ The camera wobbles, blurring the view again as she raises her hands and signals surrender. ] Hey, okay! You're the god here, all right? "Follower" it is.

[ ...She is definitely going to have to park her ass on a throne so Anger Management, Jr. over here can't push her around... ]

How do you want to do this, then?

[ He points out the door, snarling: ] I need priests? Then find some priests!

[ ...look. He's had a rough couple of days, okay? ]

Comments

video;

[ichoosefight]

Could you maybe not make it snow harder? Not everyone who was brought here has a place to stay.

video;

[killthepast]

[ The reply comes a bit later, when he thinks to check, because I just remembered that this post wasn't made with his phone, anyway. ]

And?

[ Not his problem! ]

video;

[ichoosefight]

And if you think you're not gonna need allies here, you're full of it. Not being a douchebag is the easiest way to get some.

[killthepast]

And if you want me to do anything about the snow, you'll have to find another way of appealing to me.

[ichoosefight]

[ She snorts a laugh. ]

You say that like you have any control over it right now.

video;

[heirtonothing]

[ Goddess people need to make a choice. Do we do text, audio, or video? WHAT IS THE STANDARD ZELDA JUST DOESN'T KNOW ]

As far as I've been able to ascertain we have very little power at this juncture. That may change over time. Logically, it might be related to the number of followers a so-called god has.

video;

[killthepast]

[ Later, when he thinks to check the network~

Snappishly: ] I have all the power that I need in the meantime.

[ The Force, baby! ]

video;

[heirtonothing]

[ Zelda does not like being snapped at. Her expression turns perfectly neutral, her tone even. ]

My observation was aimed at your female friend, though as you've taken a throne yourself you may benefit from learning more about the mechanics of this system.

video;

[plasthmatic]

Follower. Female follower.

I don't think the Ice King knows how to handle friendship yet. Small steps.

video;

[heirtonothing]

Follower.

[ She's not sure how she feels about that label when Abigail had been aiming for 'friend', but she can respect her wishes.

Abigail hasn't offended her, but Zelda's tone is still pretty level. ]

The Time throne would have been more useful to the basic functions of the town.

[tatra]

Oh my! You do seem energetic, don't you?

[killthepast]

....Energetic?

[tatra]

It's good! It's healthy for young people to have plenty of energy, even in the cold.

video

[choosetruth]

[Georgia raises an eyebrow behind her sunglasses.]

Figured it was only a matter of time before the power hungry dickbags started showing up.

[Irresponsible dumbasses were one thing, Chase. This is something else.]

I hope you don't think you can get everything you want by yelling, Mr. Ren. I don't tolerate bullies. No matter how far up their own ass with power they are.

[killthepast]

[ 'Mister'....? Not a common way of addressing someone where he's from, so there's a momentary look of confusion. Then he draws his brows together again with another frown. ]

Ren is a title. The 'mister' is unnecessary. [ Though, really, he'd prefer to be called 'Supreme Leader,' buuuut the First Order isn't here right now, so it's kind of moot.

...

And, no, he's not bothering with the rest of the comment. ]

[choosetruth]

My point stands, Kylo.

[She is not using your stupid made up title.]

[citrines]

Huh. If only there was some way to keep snow off of certain people.

[And by certain people, she means her teenage self, because she's currently got a nice little wind bubble that is keeping all of the snow at bay.]

I wonder what would happen if I pulled all of the wind from your storm clouds away.

[Not that she can do it, but listen, asshole, she can be one too.]